New Student
by PyroKitty2
Summary: A Mary-sue enters the school! What will happen and will a cirtin author be able to finish it in 30 minuites (which she did ^^) Humor is one of the only generas here....


Authors Note: I was searching around the Harry Potter fan fiction section not that long ago and was looking up romance stories…..trust me, i'm not a big fan of romance; angst is great though ^^ I was actually looking for Draco romance fics for my friend who is in Wyoming somewhere and has no access to a computer so I'm mailing her some. I noticed a lot of Original characters…..I read one and just started to laugh! It was such a "MarySue-ish" fic I couldn't help but laugh…..it inspired me to write my own! Well lets start now, I got to get this done in 30 minutes or less or it wont be a "true" Mary-sue…..and cant forget to use no "big words" like *shudders* announced…(The next authors not is fake by the way…..but I have seen some like that that's why I added it)

A/N: If I don't get 4738745782873487238974 reviews telling me how great I am i'm never going to write fanfics again!!

New Student

All the students at Hogwarts crowded into the 'Great Hall'. Ron sat next to Hermione who defiantly didn't deserve him but they had been going out anyways.

Dumbledore tapped on his glass with a fork. "May I have your attention please!?" He yelled to the room. Everyone fell quiet.

"I am pleased to announce that we have a new student in our school as of today. She is an exchange student from America."

A girl walked into the Great hall. She had long beautiful, flowing, silky, pretty, gorgeous, blond hair that draped from her head and made her look like an angel. What was even more beautiful were her deep, mysterious, complex, beautiful, (insert more adjectives here) violet eyes. And to top it all off she had the most round and beautiful double D breasts.

All the males in the room from all ages started to drool; she was positively the most gorgeous girl they had ever seen.

She was wearing a low-cut, v-neck tank top that was leather with a bust of 57.3784737845623764. She wore a black leather jacket over it. For pants she was wearing a size 2 in juniors of black leather pants with a waist size of 15.4738465782678364278460. She wore black leather knee-high boots that were size 6 1/5743875 and on her head she wore a black leather headband which her hair flowed through perfectly.

"Miss Sue, you should be wearing your Hogwarts Cloak but since you look so stunning in that I guess you can wear that…" Commented Professor Snape.

She smiled. "Thank you." She then walked up to the front of the great hall and sat on a stool placing the sorting had on her head.

"Plenty of courage, pure heart, smartest person i've ever seen, cleaver…..I know just where to pt you!" The Sorting hat stated. "GRYFFINDOR!!!"

Cheers were heard from throughout the room and she walked off the stage sitting between Harry Potter and Ron Weasley. "Hi, i'm Kitty!" She said cheerfully.

"H.H.Hi…..I-Im H-Harry P-P-Potter…."

"A-and I-I'm R-Ron W-W-W-Weasley…."

They were both mystified by her beauty. She leaned foreword to pick up some lowfat-chlestoralfree-vegitarian-sugarfree hamburgers from the table. Harry and Ron couldn't help but stare at her breasts as she leaned over.

A FEW DAYS LATER….

They were all at the great hall again sitting in the same spots. "Ou est la maison de retraite la plus proche? J'ai besoin d'une nouvelle grand-mère?" Kitty asked to Harry. She spoke fluent French but didn't know most of it so she put together words to sound smart. (The sentence really means "Where is the closest retirement village? I need a new grandmother.")

Harry just nodded and she stood up walking out of the Great Hall. She walked down the hall and soon arrived upon a tall statue of a scrawny looking man. She then said "Gsjdfijrhsfj sdajiofjrhjshgf"

A door appeared and she climbed through closing it behind her. In the dark room lit only by candle light was Draco Malfoy.

She smiled as she looked into his grey eyes. "Où se trouve Sesame Street, s'il vous plaît?" She asked sexily.

"What does that mean?" Draco asked her.

"It means I love you….." She then hugged him passionately kissing him. (It really means "Can you tell me how to get to Sesame Street?" ^^)

They continued showing their love to on another.

A COUPLE OF DAYS LATER

"Harry, ron," Kitty Cried to them.

"What is it?" They both asked.

"I-I love you both, and also Draco, Oliver, Neville…." And random other guys... "But I can't choose who I want to be with!"

The both looked at her sadly and an idea popped into their head. "Well since you're getting the best grades in every subject, and are the most pretty girl ever, why don't you just share yourself with all of us?"

"Yeah!! That's what I should do!!"

Suddenly out of nowhere all of the guys in the school were sitting with her in the library commenting on her good looks when Voldemort appeared.

All the boys were scared and she stood up. "Even though we're more experienced then you and your 4 years younger then us and haven't shown any signs of magical talent in this fic yet we lay our lives in your hands Kitty" Said all the guys/

She raised her wand and then said "Wjrejkthshfduih euhruishiudf" and Voldemort was killed but not before he had sliced her arm.

She fell to the floor and gasped for air. "I….I don't think ill make it…..I'm happy I saved you guys….but I love you…..please remember me….." She said as she died dramatically.

ONE WEEK LATER

All the people of the school arrived at her funeral and everyone cried. All the students expressed their love to her and then Draco kissed her dead body before he to killed himself hoping to be with his true love.

A/N: REVIEW OR THEIR wONT BE A SeQUAl!!!!!!!!1111111111!!!!!!!!111111!!!!!!

Real Authors note: That was fun to write ^^ And I only named the character kitty to point out that in some way most Mary sues are named after the author in some way ^^ and trust me,…..I wasn't being serious in this fic so don't think id make a character like that unless it was for a fic like this! Well review if you want to! Flames are also great as donations to the "Warm Pyro Fund" it's getting kind of chilly down here in hell xDD


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